Putting off retirement forever | Mar 02nd 2009
Self-employment was, perhaps, the first opportunity I’d had since I began working full time (back in 1992) to reflect on the process of my work, rather than the product of my work.
Process versus product is an important distinction, as it turns out. For the first 18 years of my working life, I was focused on the product of my work. I don’t mean what my work produced – most of that was intangible anyway (answering phones, editing documents, sitting in meetings, etc.)
The product I’m referring to is my paycheck. I worked for that paycheck and while I took pride in the quality of my work, whatever “work” was at any given time, I didn’t particularly enjoy doing it.
My days were filled with clock watching moments of long-drawn out agony, extremely reminiscent of my childhood years as a student. In fact, this same “clock watching” mentality permeated my school years. I did my work to get better grades, but not through any enjoyment of learning.
So I guess it’s safe to say that self-employment finally put an end to a life time of rushing through the weeks, months and years with the goal of getting the prize at the end – that paycheck. Ironically, I make more money now than I ever thought possible when I worked for that end goal.
But old habits die hard. Even now, in my seventh year of self-employment, I find myself wistfully looking forward. What will life be like in ten years or twenty? What would I do with all the time and (hopefully) money I’ll have in the future when I’m retired?
And speaking of retirement, is it truly the ultimate prize at the end? According to Elderweb, the average age of retirement in 2000 was 62, and the typical retiree could expect to live 18 years or more past the age of retirement.
But what can it mean to live all those years without working, particularly in a country without adequate health coverage or retirement benefits? Is retirement really a prize?
Self-employment has shown me that the notion of spending my time as I please does not have to wait.
So instead of wistfully thinking about all the time I’ll have to do nothing, I’ve begun thinking about retirement as the time I get to do more of the work I love – writing, drawing, learning new things and, yes, working.
I’m beginning to think the prize is the process itself.
–
This article was originally published in the Poughkeepsie Journal on January 24, 2009.